Surrender December Day 2

6.30am the alarm sounded, I grabbed the alarm feeling awake and ready for the day
6.31am a wave of exhaustion hit me - sooo hard it knocked me back into bed!

Umm...not really how I imagined day 2 of Surrender December starting... but it was actually a great opportunity for me to turn to God in my weariness and trust him for the strength to face the day. So after a bit more dozing in sleepy thought, I turned to Isaiah 42v1-10 in the Bible - one of the Bible readings from Church last night - a prophecy about Jesus which was fulfilled as we see in the New Testament accounts of Jesus' life, death and resurrection:

“Here is my servant, whom I uphold,
    my chosen one in whom I delight;
I will put my Spirit on him,
    and he will bring justice to the nations.
² He will not shout or cry out,
    or raise his voice in the streets.
³ A bruised reed he will not break,
    and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out.
In faithfulness he will bring forth justice;
⁴     he will not falter or be discouraged
till he establishes justice on earth.
    In his teaching the islands will put their hope.”

⁵ This is what God the Lord says—
the Creator of the heavens, who stretches them out,
    who spreads out the earth with all that springs from it,
    who gives breath to its people,
    and life to those who walk on it:
⁶ “I, the Lord, have called you in righteousness;
    I will take hold of your hand.
I will keep you and will make you
    to be a covenant for the people
    and a light for the Gentiles,
⁷ to open eyes that are blind,
    to free captives from prison
    and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness.

⁸ “I am the Lord; that is my name!
    I will not yield my glory to another
    or my praise to idols.
⁹ See, the former things have taken place,
    and new things I declare;
before they spring into being
    I announce them to you.”

¹⁰ Sing to the Lord a new song,
    his praise from the ends of the earth,
you who go down to the sea, and all that is in it,
    you islands, and all who live in them.

Bottom Line for me as I read this - This is the heart, character and power of the God in whom I put my trust... YEP I'M HAPPY TO LET HIM TAKE CHARGE TODAY!

As I surrendered my plans to him I felt more at peace. Trusting him with my work load and 'agenda' actually made me more available to follow his plan. It was definitely a more satisfying day today. My weariness did not last all day either - in fact I became more energised through the day as I experienced doing life WITH God, rather than on my own.

I'm excited to keep growing closer to God through this!

God provided a way for a group of young people and I to meet together to share our grief and encourage each other As we prayed together and shared, we were all so inspired by Zac as we reflected on his life, that we were energised to really live passionately for Jesus, to love and rejoice in Him. This was a gift, and it reminded me that God's people are a gift from God to help us draw nearer to him - we need each other. So please ask someone trustworthy for help/support if you need/want it. And ask God at the same time - he is able and willing to provide - after all, it is Surrender December so it's a good time to go to God first [anytime is really ;)]

Surrender December

Tragedy brings perspective - the realisation that we need to let go of the things that are meaningless and life-draining, in order to cling to the source of Life.

This year I've faced many big changes in my life. As exciting as they were, they were also scary and quite stressful. Being the passionate, energetic person I am, who loves new things and possibilities, I dove right into my new work and surroundings with dedication. Though I started out with passion, and a desire to bring honour to Jesus through what I was doing, the stress and demands of juggling all the new things made me anxious and fearful. The craziness of my life swept me up and I doggy-paddled hard with my own strength just to survive. But survival is now the full life Jesus saved me for - he saved me for a fulfilling relationship with him. I've been growing increasingly more dissatisfied with the way I am handling my life, so I've been started making steps to put ALL my life back in Jesus' hands.

Yesterday a young guy, who's path I had crossed various times back in Port Macquarie, was killed by a shark while he was surfing with some mates. His name is Zac Young. A family member of a friend, and a great friend and inspiration to many other people I love. After hearing the news and now hearing so many stories of his influence in people's lives from the great love he had from and in Jesus - the passion, dedication and deep trust he had in Jesus - it was even more evident to me that I need more Jesus in my life and less of me. I was inspired by Zac to treasure Jesus more and seek Jesus' first.

Tonight as I sat in church, the phrase 'Surrender December' rang so loudly in my ears - so here making a conscious decision to dedicate December to re-learning one precious gift of a day at a time what it is to surrender my whole life to Jesus, the one who gives LIFE in place of my so called version of 'life'.

Each day I will be opening the Bible and intentionally giving to God in prayer, and acts of trust, the areas of my life I have been trying to control or make work all by myself. Work is one of the big areas. So here on the blog I will share some of the things I'm discovering, re-learning, truths about God, resources that are helping me.

I wanted to share this with you because maybe you've been facing some anxious times, or been working hard to make life work and it's just not working [notice that menacing word 'work'!] Maybe you have found life in Jesus, but have let some things come before your relationship with Him. Maybe you turned away from Jesus or have never known Him. Wherever you're 'at' right now, the days coming towards Christmas are a great opportunity to make space for discovering or rediscovering this God Man who satisfies the soul, brings healing to the broken-hearted, can reconcile the seemingly irreconcilable, and love like no other. Perhaps this Christmas will end up being an even more meaningful and treasured time in our lives because we Surrendered December to Jesus.

If you want to join in you are very welcome to - you don't even have to tell me, but it would surely be an encouragement to have some fellow travellers or at least people cheering me on to stick with it.

So let's start - I'm starting by surrendering 'Surrender December' to Jesus, asking him to take charge of this idea and to strengthen me to stick with it each day, as well as making it such a transforming time that it will last beyond December.

Last things

After being here for 6 years I am near the end of my last week of official work. As you can imagine, there have already been many 'last things'. Last staff and team meetings, last Chapel with students, last day of school, last youth gatherings, last looks...

Here's what these last things have showed me so far:
- Life rolls on without us. I know it sounds a bit morbid, but really most of my 'last' experiences of this season of my life in this place and these roles, have seemed like just another day and nothing is changing. People will keep planning for the future here, things I have done someone else will do in their own way. It's a humbling experience really. It's also a good thing, a reassuring thing.

- Last things don't quite feel like last things because they always lead into First things, new things - so there isn't a real end while we're living. As someone who believes Jesus is God, even death isn't an end. Which leads me to the next point...

- There is always hope. I have hope, that even though I leave here soon, I will return - whether for a day or more, I will see the faces of people I love again. I have hope that God will keep using the time I have had here, and he will use the next season of my life - both for my good and the good of others.

So here's to last things that don't stay last forever :)

Moving: Step 1? The CLEAN OUT!

For a while now this whole moving deal has seemed quite surreal... there's still have a month or so til I completely move, but the process has begun. People have already been saying goodbye - even though I will see most of them at one of my farewells in the coming weeks. But the thing that indicates to me that I am moving is the 'cleaning out' process...which has just begun this week. 

Anyone who comes to my home now will be able to tell I am moving [or just think that I am either a hoarder or nutter for sorting so thoroughly]. One can collect alot over 6yrs! I'm starting to realise there really is a different mindset between Settled and Short-term Focus/Nomadic.

Settled

When I moved here, it was for the long haul. I started out with very little - coming straight from college where I did stints in a 1 bedroom granny flat or the bedroom of someone's family home. The first flat I ever moved into here was a 3 bedroom townhouse - which felt pretty empty once I had unpacked. All my homes here since then have been that size or bigger. So of course I filled them with furniture and created a home office and a spare room in each. I collected things that I thought would be useful for ministry or life in the long-term. I like that feeling of having resources at your fingertips. 

Nomadic

It looks like I'll be moving in with some dear friends of mine in Sydney who have generously offered me a room/their home and their family life. I am really looking forward to it :) I have no idea how long I'll be there for, or where I would move to afterwards. So there's this sense of Adventure and freedom, and a lack of need for lots of material things [particularly because I won't be able to afford them - which really is liberating in some ways].

 

Now I can't wait to downsize, rid myself of all this helpful and possibly helpful stuff that I have. I really don't mind the idea of fitting everything I have into my car - though, that really won't be possible even after I downsize... So this whole cleaning out process is quite enjoyable, even if it is a bit tedious and tiring. Plus it's always interesting to rediscover things. 

You know what... it still really doesn't seem real that my life is about to dramatically change. Better get back to phase 1 of my cleanout before my housemate arrives home to the mess!

Life is changing for Mel Part 2: New Adventure

If you read Part 1 of my post yesterday you've possibly been hanging out for this post (or you're wondering what all the talk about traffic and lights is means). If not, you can read it here. What has been happening in my life over the past year or so has been such a significant ride for me that I needed to describe it somehow before I could tell you the outcome.

All the 'red lights' helped me to clarify what my purpose is in life, what I'm shaped for and the visions I really want to pursue. Like I said yesterday I have a strong passion for helping young people grow to have the fullest life they can have on this earth and in eternity. First and foremost that means giving them an opportunity to meet and know their maker and saviour Jesus - the source of life. Jesus transforms our whole lives and draws us together into a family. So I'm a believer in a wholistic approach to sharing Jesus with young people and helping them following him with ever part of themselves, as well as build quality relationships with people from all age groups. I want to further explore Emotional Intelligence (EQ/EI), developmental stages, learning styles, relational skills and more, in order to find a way to integrate helping young people grow in these ways as we share Jesus with them (evangelism) and nurture them in their faith (discipleship). I want to study Biblical foundations of this also, so that I have a good foundation for the approach that honors Jesus and doesn't distract us from sharing Jesus with people.

At the same time I want to develop my skills more so I can apply what I discover, and help others apply it. I have a vision of how all this might work that includes bringing generations together, which excites me and if I don't take the opportunity now to give it a go, I could easily never really try.

An opportunity has come my way. If you read yesterday's post I would say that a gap in the traffic opened up... My church contract ends soon which has meant my Ministers and I have been trying to discern what's best for all of us next year. Im thankful I have such great Ministers/bosses. There's been no 'road rage' between us in this. They genuinely want what's best for me, I genuinely want what's best for my church family, and me too. When the gap opened up the turning lane was on a red light. I had to decide whether to just take a punt and get in that lane (resign next yr) or stay. Then the green light came in the form of a job as a Project Manager and Coach for a youth personal leadership program called Max Potential. I was involved as a community coach for 2 yrs in port Mac and looooved it! Adults from community organisations get trained to coach a young adult (usually students grade 11) over 22weeks through the MAXIMISERS Principles to help them think seriously about their life, habits, character, belief system and values, as well as develop skills to grow (and take responsibility for their own growth without a coach after the program).You can check it out here http://www.max-potential.com.au/

Well I said Yes!

It's a massive shift. It's definitely stepping into the unknown. I don't know where I'll live, exactly when I'll move, how I'll get there, what church I'll connect with, what it will really look like financially and even practically in terms of time what a normal week will look like. I do know though that no matter how all the unknowns work out, it's worth it. Over time you'll more than likely be hearing more about it from me.

I'm in the turning lane now, driving slowly to the lights because I still have to wrap up my work here. In early 2013 ie Jan/Feb I'll be moving back to Sydney. Leaving port is going to be tough. I will miss sooo much about the people and the place and the work I've been doing. Yet I'm pretty darn excited about my new adventure and where it could lead in the future. I actually jumped up and down and squealed after I accepted the job over the phone. 

A little while ago I drew this pic - on the edge of the cliff - because I felt like that that's where I was at... wanting to abseil into the unknown, but frozen on the edge... not anymore :D

Life is changing for Mel... Part 1 Traffic Lights

What are you like at red traffic lights? Me... I pride myself in my ability to be quick off the mark when the lights go from red to green. As soon as I hit a red light I am in 'ready to go' mode. The clutch [yes I drive a manual - enjoy it] is poised and my right foot angled close to the accelerator, my eyes keenly watching the moving traffic for changes in pace. I monitor the lights that are green for the other traffic waiting for them to turn orange upon which I heighten my alertness look to my traffic lights, see the green and I'm off! Proudly enjoying beating the car next to me without speeding :)

My attitude towards red traffic lights is usually the same as my attitude to the 'red lights' and 'stop' signs of life - when I reach them I get ready for when they turn to 'go' and eagerly anticipate it. However, as I reflected recently I realised that my attitude had become like that of waiting on the pacific hwy in traffic jams... you know you'll be waiting a while and there's no point in staying alert and ready, just switch off the engine, grab a book, tweet your situation, get out and throw a frisby around, eat some food, observe everyone else's behaviour [and try to guess what their saying or thinking just for fun]... whatever will just distract you from the waiting. And even then, when people start turning on their cars and gradually edging forward very slowly, I'd wait in my car until cars are really moving [rather than stop starting], before turning the key.

Over the past year or so I have had soooo many red lights that never turned green, though they showed promise... In all areas if my life. If i believe something is important and possible, I pour myself into pursuing it with excitement, passion and lots of serious thought and action. After 'revving' the engine constantly only to find the lights weren't changing I gave up. I started treating life like I was stuck on the pacific hwy in a halted traffic jam. There's no point even thinking about turning the car key until you see cars a few ahead of you start to drive off in a smooth constant pace. So in the mean time you do whatever will take your mind off waiting. Focus disappears. you don't even think about seeing if there is anything you can do to help the traffic move along, cause you know you have no control over it. I stopped trying to make positive changes in what I was doing in ministry and settled for just doing what I could each day to help people without trying to change a system or get people to try new things. I wasn't confident there was any value in trying due to all the red lights. I found I was happier because the lower bar I had set myself meant I was reaching my short term goals well, particularly in ministry. And life was easier because it usually is when you work with the systems you're in and fall in line.

But it wasn't as satisfying. my passion for life, for helping Young people find and live life to the full -whatever it takes- is so deep-seeded that it wasn't going to let me silence it. So I tried one more time to change one of the systems around me so that I would be free to focus on all the things that I envisioned.

I came to realise though that what was happening was that I needed to make a change rather than make everyone change for me. I now see it as like being in a long line of traffic where I want to go into the right-hand turning lane to take another route to our destination. Yet the line of traffic stretches past the turning lane so I can see it, I can see the green light for that lane with noone else in it, but I can't move into the lane just yet. Ever had that happen on the road? Frustrating isn't it. So more waiting ensued, trying to remain faithful to the people and task I have at the moment.

I actually love this place, the people and the Incredible opportunities I've had to 'walk alongside' people. I just have a different picture of how I can keep doing that into the future.

Sweet Victory and Sour Sorrow: AFL & Poverty

As a loyal Sydney Swans fan [from my days of old] last night's AFL victory to advance into the Grand Finals was definitely an exciting moment!! I wasn't able to watch the game, but my faithful Father and Sister kept me up to date via text :) I probably won't even be able to watch the Grand Final as I'll be at a camp, but I remain excited about the event :) Either way I'll share it with my Dad and Big Sister, which makes it even more fun. There is something about a shared experience that makes it all the better. Celebrating with lots of facebook friends today, as multiple posts of Swannies jubilation hit my newsfeed, also sparked a sense of satisfaction and excitement. 

It's quite incredible how sports and competition can thrill us, drawing our energy and emotion in. It's fleeting though, after all it doesn't happen every day and every moment [which is a good thing].


Anyway, today a friend 'tweeted' an article by SMH on how many of our sports balls are being made by young girls in poverty and in bad conditions. I recommend you watch this journalist report here

It could really easy not to click on the above link and just keep reading so if you haven't watch the video do it now. It will not take long. It's really important and relevant to all of us. We are so detached from the reality of poverty. We need to expose ourselves to the truth often in order to undo our detachment. Here's the link again: http://www.smh.com.au/national/poor-children-made-to-stitch-sports-balls-in-sweatshops-20120921-26c0z.html

Let me know when you have watched it, then I'll post my response and hopefully I'll get to hear yours too.

Mel<><