Life is changing for Mel Part 2: New Adventure

If you read Part 1 of my post yesterday you've possibly been hanging out for this post (or you're wondering what all the talk about traffic and lights is means). If not, you can read it here. What has been happening in my life over the past year or so has been such a significant ride for me that I needed to describe it somehow before I could tell you the outcome.

All the 'red lights' helped me to clarify what my purpose is in life, what I'm shaped for and the visions I really want to pursue. Like I said yesterday I have a strong passion for helping young people grow to have the fullest life they can have on this earth and in eternity. First and foremost that means giving them an opportunity to meet and know their maker and saviour Jesus - the source of life. Jesus transforms our whole lives and draws us together into a family. So I'm a believer in a wholistic approach to sharing Jesus with young people and helping them following him with ever part of themselves, as well as build quality relationships with people from all age groups. I want to further explore Emotional Intelligence (EQ/EI), developmental stages, learning styles, relational skills and more, in order to find a way to integrate helping young people grow in these ways as we share Jesus with them (evangelism) and nurture them in their faith (discipleship). I want to study Biblical foundations of this also, so that I have a good foundation for the approach that honors Jesus and doesn't distract us from sharing Jesus with people.

At the same time I want to develop my skills more so I can apply what I discover, and help others apply it. I have a vision of how all this might work that includes bringing generations together, which excites me and if I don't take the opportunity now to give it a go, I could easily never really try.

An opportunity has come my way. If you read yesterday's post I would say that a gap in the traffic opened up... My church contract ends soon which has meant my Ministers and I have been trying to discern what's best for all of us next year. Im thankful I have such great Ministers/bosses. There's been no 'road rage' between us in this. They genuinely want what's best for me, I genuinely want what's best for my church family, and me too. When the gap opened up the turning lane was on a red light. I had to decide whether to just take a punt and get in that lane (resign next yr) or stay. Then the green light came in the form of a job as a Project Manager and Coach for a youth personal leadership program called Max Potential. I was involved as a community coach for 2 yrs in port Mac and looooved it! Adults from community organisations get trained to coach a young adult (usually students grade 11) over 22weeks through the MAXIMISERS Principles to help them think seriously about their life, habits, character, belief system and values, as well as develop skills to grow (and take responsibility for their own growth without a coach after the program).You can check it out here http://www.max-potential.com.au/

Well I said Yes!

It's a massive shift. It's definitely stepping into the unknown. I don't know where I'll live, exactly when I'll move, how I'll get there, what church I'll connect with, what it will really look like financially and even practically in terms of time what a normal week will look like. I do know though that no matter how all the unknowns work out, it's worth it. Over time you'll more than likely be hearing more about it from me.

I'm in the turning lane now, driving slowly to the lights because I still have to wrap up my work here. In early 2013 ie Jan/Feb I'll be moving back to Sydney. Leaving port is going to be tough. I will miss sooo much about the people and the place and the work I've been doing. Yet I'm pretty darn excited about my new adventure and where it could lead in the future. I actually jumped up and down and squealed after I accepted the job over the phone. 

A little while ago I drew this pic - on the edge of the cliff - because I felt like that that's where I was at... wanting to abseil into the unknown, but frozen on the edge... not anymore :D

Life is changing for Mel... Part 1 Traffic Lights

What are you like at red traffic lights? Me... I pride myself in my ability to be quick off the mark when the lights go from red to green. As soon as I hit a red light I am in 'ready to go' mode. The clutch [yes I drive a manual - enjoy it] is poised and my right foot angled close to the accelerator, my eyes keenly watching the moving traffic for changes in pace. I monitor the lights that are green for the other traffic waiting for them to turn orange upon which I heighten my alertness look to my traffic lights, see the green and I'm off! Proudly enjoying beating the car next to me without speeding :)

My attitude towards red traffic lights is usually the same as my attitude to the 'red lights' and 'stop' signs of life - when I reach them I get ready for when they turn to 'go' and eagerly anticipate it. However, as I reflected recently I realised that my attitude had become like that of waiting on the pacific hwy in traffic jams... you know you'll be waiting a while and there's no point in staying alert and ready, just switch off the engine, grab a book, tweet your situation, get out and throw a frisby around, eat some food, observe everyone else's behaviour [and try to guess what their saying or thinking just for fun]... whatever will just distract you from the waiting. And even then, when people start turning on their cars and gradually edging forward very slowly, I'd wait in my car until cars are really moving [rather than stop starting], before turning the key.

Over the past year or so I have had soooo many red lights that never turned green, though they showed promise... In all areas if my life. If i believe something is important and possible, I pour myself into pursuing it with excitement, passion and lots of serious thought and action. After 'revving' the engine constantly only to find the lights weren't changing I gave up. I started treating life like I was stuck on the pacific hwy in a halted traffic jam. There's no point even thinking about turning the car key until you see cars a few ahead of you start to drive off in a smooth constant pace. So in the mean time you do whatever will take your mind off waiting. Focus disappears. you don't even think about seeing if there is anything you can do to help the traffic move along, cause you know you have no control over it. I stopped trying to make positive changes in what I was doing in ministry and settled for just doing what I could each day to help people without trying to change a system or get people to try new things. I wasn't confident there was any value in trying due to all the red lights. I found I was happier because the lower bar I had set myself meant I was reaching my short term goals well, particularly in ministry. And life was easier because it usually is when you work with the systems you're in and fall in line.

But it wasn't as satisfying. my passion for life, for helping Young people find and live life to the full -whatever it takes- is so deep-seeded that it wasn't going to let me silence it. So I tried one more time to change one of the systems around me so that I would be free to focus on all the things that I envisioned.

I came to realise though that what was happening was that I needed to make a change rather than make everyone change for me. I now see it as like being in a long line of traffic where I want to go into the right-hand turning lane to take another route to our destination. Yet the line of traffic stretches past the turning lane so I can see it, I can see the green light for that lane with noone else in it, but I can't move into the lane just yet. Ever had that happen on the road? Frustrating isn't it. So more waiting ensued, trying to remain faithful to the people and task I have at the moment.

I actually love this place, the people and the Incredible opportunities I've had to 'walk alongside' people. I just have a different picture of how I can keep doing that into the future.

Sweet Victory and Sour Sorrow: AFL & Poverty

As a loyal Sydney Swans fan [from my days of old] last night's AFL victory to advance into the Grand Finals was definitely an exciting moment!! I wasn't able to watch the game, but my faithful Father and Sister kept me up to date via text :) I probably won't even be able to watch the Grand Final as I'll be at a camp, but I remain excited about the event :) Either way I'll share it with my Dad and Big Sister, which makes it even more fun. There is something about a shared experience that makes it all the better. Celebrating with lots of facebook friends today, as multiple posts of Swannies jubilation hit my newsfeed, also sparked a sense of satisfaction and excitement. 

It's quite incredible how sports and competition can thrill us, drawing our energy and emotion in. It's fleeting though, after all it doesn't happen every day and every moment [which is a good thing].


Anyway, today a friend 'tweeted' an article by SMH on how many of our sports balls are being made by young girls in poverty and in bad conditions. I recommend you watch this journalist report here

It could really easy not to click on the above link and just keep reading so if you haven't watch the video do it now. It will not take long. It's really important and relevant to all of us. We are so detached from the reality of poverty. We need to expose ourselves to the truth often in order to undo our detachment. Here's the link again: http://www.smh.com.au/national/poor-children-made-to-stitch-sports-balls-in-sweatshops-20120921-26c0z.html

Let me know when you have watched it, then I'll post my response and hopefully I'll get to hear yours too.

Mel<><

Don't shop while you're hungry??

'They' say never go shopping when you're hungry.

Well I was shopping today when I was hungry - Not because I was hungry - and the collective 'they' were in my head!
"You'll end up buying something bad for you, spend more money than necessary/buy more than you need "

As I headed to the fresh bakery section of woolies with the sole intention of grabbing the healthiest snack there I was determined not to splurge just because I was hungry. Upon approaching the magic clear doors and glanced across the array of 'delicious' it was the blueberry muffin that caught my eye... But wait... Despite its healthier status to chocolate it really isn't a good lunch option. Hmm so my eyes searched across the display and there they were... 3 of the best looking cream finger buns you've ever seen! You know the ones with sweet cream carefully laid in the long finger bun for you to see, decorated with the squiggly line of rich red jam!! I used to eat these at school. As I stood there consciously reminding myself that the health risks outway the temporary satisfaction with this choice, I was seriously tempted, so much so that I stood there perhaps a little long. I couldn't tell if I just wanted to eat it because it reminded me of my 'yesterdays' or because they are so sweet and I haven't eaten one in long time (which would make it alright to treat myself right?). And what if I was only remembering how much I liked them then, only to eat one now and be disappointed?! Well suffice to say I held my ground, grabbed the Hawaiian pizza looking thing and paced quickly away from those magic doors...

food can be such a distraction!

Ps. Happy with my choice:)
Pss. Despite the wisdom of the 'They' of you have run out of food or are starving then you should forget the 'They' and go shopping

'R U OK?' Day

  

Just in case you haven't heard, today is 'R U OK?' Day here is Australia. I say 'is' because you still have time to ask someone if they are ok. Of course you can ask them tomorrow as well - but the aim of today is partly to remind us not to leave it too long to ask this question of people, rather feel free to ask more regularly.

It's kinda sad that we have to have a day to remind us to ask each other how were are going... but I am glad we do. It does some helpful things like:

• highlights the importance of talking to each other 
• gives people permission to ask in situations they normally wouldn't feel like they could
• reminds us to open our eyes and ears, and even mouths, more to the many people who are struggling - often silently [hence the need to open our eyes... as well as our mouths to ask the question and speak words of hope, support and encouragement]

If you haven't checked out the official website it is worth doing so. It has some good information and resources to help us help each other through the tougher times of life. Check it out here

This particular resource page from the website is really helpful if you want some quick practical tips on how to say 'R U OK?' Yep, I know that sounds a little silly. But there are lots of ways to find out if someone is OK and to really Listen. Sometimes the question 'are you OK?' doesn't help someone open up. Sometimes it's how we are portraying ourselves that may prevent someone from opening up. That's why this is a useful fact sheet to look at.    

I've recently asked 2 questions related to 'R U OK?' day via twitter and facebook. So I'll blog some more about this later.

In the mean time...

• If there is something weighing you down today find someone you trust and tell them, even if they haven't asked 'are you ok?'. 
• If you have noone to share your struggle with right now, LifeLine hotline has great people who listen and care. Call 13 11 14
• If you haven't tried to genuinely find out how someone is going today here are a few questions you could ask besides 'are you ok?' that may help start a good conversation
• what's been worrying you lately, if anything?
• what's been the high point and the low point of your day?
• If you could change anything about your life now, what would it be?
• what's 1 thing that has been weighing you down lately?

 "Connection and open, honest conversations are good for our wellbeing – whether or not we’re struggling with a problem. It helps us to feel valued and supported by the people around us. There's also an emerging body of research which links supportive social relationships and a sense of social connection with protective factors in suicide prevention." ['R U OK? Day' Website FAG page]