Re-Activating Life

Life has been very interesting this year, and not all in an exciting way... mostly in a confusing: "I don't really know what's going on" kind of way. I've grappled; wrestled; questioned; listened; 'tested the waters'; paused decisions; given up and let the tide take me wherever' taken steps of faith; adapted; grown; as well as done the whole 'flop on the floor in a state of stubborn unhappy obedience' like a grumpy kid kind of thing... not all in that order, but definitely a few rounds of each. This is why you haven't heard much from me here for a while. 

This morning I decided to focus on the smaller things in my life, rather than the bigger things. I've already made the most important decision in my life, the biggest one of all: To follow Jesus, the King of the Universe and whatever is beyond. Being faithful to that decision is not and easy road.

Life is purposeful, thus it requires us to live it intentionally, not passively. My life has been given purpose, meaning, joy, love and hope that runs deep and flows into eternity. Yet I find myself making everyday choices, even defaulting to 'old self' habits [as if I don't have to choose - which in itself is a choice!], that aren't in the spirit of 'Living the Change".  They don't lead me to more fulfilling life, rather they slowly and subtly lead me in the way of 'death'.

I've been thinking about about Romans 12v1-2 

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. ² Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

On Tuesday night I heard v2 again, and I honestly thought: "I am tired of having to do all the changing, can't something else change so that good comes from it and I can have a break". But the next day I was preparing for a school chapel service where I was starting to wrap up the series on Jesus' "I AM" statements. God helped me to see that when Jesus says he is "the way, the truth and the life", he is basically saying that the answer to ANY and ALL our questions, confusion, uncertainty, despair... well everything is JESUS HIMSELF. It's not about me finding the right way through this time in my life or the path that I meant to walk on into the next season of my life. It's about me being with Jesus, going to Him. 

So this has led to my decision to persevere with Rom 12v1-2. This morning God reminded me - in fact I think he woke me up at 3am to get me to listen carefully - that the process of being being transformed in our mind requires non-conforming to worldly patterns and the same is true the other way around, both are dependent on each other. This is no easy process. But it IS Possible and WORTHWHILE. My problem is that I let circumstances and excuses cloud my judgment, causing me to think and feel like it's too hard when it actually isn't. First of all God himself promises to help us, He gives us other people to grow with, and then it really comes down to the small everyday decisions of your life. Now that makes it sound more possible to me.

Thus reactivating the simple rule of 'swapping' worldly habits for Godly habits that will keep me focussed on and connected with Jesus, is the key. Hence my new personal project "The Swap Project" (here) It's not really revolutionary, it's just something to help live out Rom 12v1-2. I'm trying to keep it simple so I've been really disciplined and refrained from spending lots of time making it look good - trust me that's a big deal, hehe:)

Feel free to join me in it:)